Thrills (by Jason)

"It is simply no good trying to keep any thrill - that is the very worst thing to do. Let the thrill go, let it die away. Go on through that period of death into the quieter interests and happiness that follow. And you will find you're living in a world of new thrills all the time. But if you decide to make thrills your regular diet and try to prolong them artificially, they will all get weaker & weaker and fewer & fewer, and you will be a bored disillusioned old man for the rest of your life."
-CS Lewis

OK, I know up until this point the blog has pretty much been about Hudson only, but now that Jason's busy season is winding down a little - he has some non-tax, non-Hudson thoughts. Well, not completely non-Hudson.

The above quote is taken from Mere Christianity. The second half of the quote caught my attention first as I listened to my audio tape of the book the other day. But as I copied the quote down, the first part sank in too. I can't say that I maintain a full diet of spelunking and hang-gliding - that's not my kind of thrill (although if you know someone who can teach me how to do either - I'm game). And most of us aren't action junkies with a need to risk it all to feel alive, etc. So don't think that because you have no urge to skydive that this doesn't apply to you. Its not even that most of us chase the thrill of getting plastered and pullin down ladies - maybe some of us do, but most (of the people who might read this) are already quieter than this. Rather, I think the way that this manifests in my life and the George household is through comfort and convenience and avoidance - quieter thrills. I think the idea behind the quote is that we're prone to have habits and activities where we can just get little fixes here and there to make us happy, content, not focused on what would actually satisfy or on what actually deserves our time and affection. This absolutely includes small thrills too - Starbucks, spending (usually wasting) time online, Solitaire (sting!), movies, music, getting nails or hair done, food/eating out, etc. Its all the things my mind drifts to whenever I get the idea that "this would be a good time to read my Bible or pray for my wife & son". They're the first place I go when I'm stressed/unhappy. I'll check ESPN.com - nothing good, then I'll check the Drudge - nothing I didn't see 30 minutes ago, then I'll go back to ESPN.com without even thinking because I'm in this what else can I read/do to pass time. Thank God, literally, that I only like two websites. Why does an iced latte and a game (or 30) of PDA Solitaire get my attention, time and affection? You know what's funny is that these things are my third and fourth reads - I've already gone through my first two receivers and eliminated them as options (TV and Xbox) - but still I look for others (please excuse the football analogy). Anyway, all I'm trying to say is there is something very true about our thrill-seeking nature taking us over, and it will eventually render us useless if we cling to the thrills to get us by. I think the thrills do fade in their ability to keep us occupied and satisfied - how long can you listen to one song, even one that you love, before you are tired of it and need a different song? We'll even go back to ones that we haven't heard in a while that we got sick of before. Because thrills don't last, we go from thrill to thrill to thrill and never go deep - always shallow and surface. Starbucks (the idea/experience) is not inherently evil (although the particular corporation may be), but where it becomes evil is where we continually rely on a latte to perk/cheer us up and let it or any other small thrill be our default whenever we feel bad/sad. We'll never deal with what is really going on - the fact that we're worshipping things that aren't worthy of worship. What is really going on is that we've allowed created things to usurp the Creator's throne in our lives - we're focused on temporal things instead of eternal things. We'll go on with our thrills until one day we're 65 and we can't identify any real area of impact that we've had that will last beyond the next generation.

This is the part where I say "What we need is more Jesus." While its predictable, its still true. I'm not even trying to evangelize through our blog like we have some high traffic - I bet two people read this post including Stephanie. I say it for two reasons - 1) because I realize more and more that its said so often by preachers and church folk and the like because it has merit. Chase whatever you want, its short-term satisfaction at best if its not Jesus. I need to press into Him and make every effort to know Him more because its the only thing that can slay a heart bent on worshipping xbox, shopping, food, treats, whatever. 2) I say this because solely eliminating these thrills/distractions won't do it. If you identify one or two or three that you continually lean on and eliminate them, others will spring up in their place because it has to do with your heart. I realized this recently. I sold my Xbox because it was too important to me. We decided not to get cable TV at our new apartment because I'll watch it too much if its there. While it was wise to eliminate those things because they were problems, they are only symptoms. What has happened in the weeks to follow? Did I use all that time that I previously spent on Halo and TV to study my Bible and pray with Stephanie like I wanted to do? No. Now I jack around on the internet or play Solitaire on my phone or whatever. That doesn't mean don't get rid of distractions because you'll just replace them anyway - these ultimately become idols and they should be smashed. We should continue to eliminate the things "that rob us of our affection for Jesus" (to borrow from Matt Chandler), and increase the things "that stir our affections for Jesus" (borrowed again) - and pray fervently that our hearts would be fixed on Jesus in every area. I think the Christian who finds himself in this same place of seeking thrills, even small ones, in place of Jesus could probably also point to gaping wide areas in their life where they're not engaging their community and are trying to fly solo. And if we're so often blind to our motives and affections, how dangerous is it to be blind and alone? How are problems ever identified and exposed that they might be addressed? What happens after a lifetime of taking Tylenol for symptoms and ignoring root problems? I think CS Lewis nailed it exactly - "you will be a bored disillusioned old man for the rest of your life."

I said earlier that this wasn't completely non-Hudson - I think about this stuff a lot more now that he's around. I'm fine with whatever the Lord wants to use in my life to bring about knowing Him more. But these things have been coming from so many directions lately - a men's retreat last weekend, time with Hudson, coming across this quote the other day randomly, some discussions with Stephanie - that I had to get these thoughts down in writing.

If you checked the blog because you saw there was a new post and were hoping that there was a new picture of Hudson, I'd hate to disappoint!